Crossroads

Crossroads

A 27 story construction crane

and you were the counter weight,

what were we supposed to do

after the building got made?

A juxtaposition between 

where we are now

and when the blueprints were found.

It’s like the past 

and the present

are both equally real,

a front windshield 

and the rear view mirror,

I turn the wipers on,

but that doesn’t clean off tears.

It’s not even Spring,

but I’ve got these blooms on my lemon tree that bring allergies,

pollination 

is a part of living;

a male and female

and the only way that they mate

is by inviting a third party.

The faith of a mustard seed,

He said,

“We didn’t believe.”

But

it feels like

I’ve been here before;

one door closed

and two roads in front of me,

I’m not down,

the water is fine,

it just seems like the calm

before a storm.

Sigmund Freud’s reasoning

for a child not remembering birth

was sexual repression,

he was always 

repeating,

but how long have I

been sitting on this balcony,

I told you

about that dream

when I got what I wanted,

but not what I needed

and it was backed in a corner 

facing a sunrise 

or was it a sunset,

that I was filled with...

It’d be like when a writer 

just starts out,

and he knows everything,

I read Fante

and couldn’t make it a day,

but like his protege 

I too

have an alias 

for my protagonist

so that I have the balls to write

what I need to say. 

Below this balcony,

in between the church 

and the building 

that had the shooting

a security guard keeps walking

by

and I’m left thinking

why;

does he too

see the decision

in front of me?